The Sandwich Generation refers to middle-aged individuals who are pressured to support both aging parents and growing children. They are “stuck” in the middle of caring for their aging parents-who may be ill, or in need of financial support-and their children, who require financial, physical, and emotional support.
Becoming part of The Sandwich Generation can put a huge financial burden on families. Taking care of an elderly parent while caring for your own children is a very time-consuming task. It can really affect your personal time; you are no longer able to do the things that you like to do, even just relaxing or sleeping can come less frequently. When all these tasks start consuming your life, you become at risk for mental health problems. Depression and anxiety are a huge risk factor for the Sandwich Generation, especially for women who are involved.
Many caregivers deal with older parents who are experiencing Alzheimer’s and dementia, which makes daily functioning and memory very difficult for them. Caregivers also struggle to help protect the assets of those they are caring for who may no longer be competent enough to do it themselves.
With many adults putting off having children until later in life, a generation of young adults are struggling to achieve financial independence. As a result, more children are returning home after college and living with their parents for much longer. You maybe finding yourself in this exact situation.
There are some steps that members of this generation can take to lessen the burden. The first is to discuss finances with everyone involved. If the children are adults, it’s time to get them contributing financially and moving towards independence. Set boundaries now to avoid the temptation to sacrifice your own financial goals in the future.
Talk to your parents early and often. The earlier you talk, the more you will know about any retirement plans they may have made. Discussing your parents’ retirement income and expectations for long-term care is essential. Otherwise, you could be blindsided by a life-altering diagnosis. It’s better to prepare ahead of time to assume financial responsibility.
Don’t try to go it alone. If possible, call on a spouse or partner for backup. Assuming it can fit into the budget, hiring help can be a wise way to take care of the parts of life — like cleaning — that end up getting neglected and causing more stress to the caregiver. Remember that the support you’re providing for your children and parents can be emotionally and physically draining. Although you’re used to balancing everything on your shoulders, it’s OK to ask for help.
Emotions can drive your financial decision-making. Decisions made from a sense of obligation or guilt can be problematic. To make the best choices, you must remove emotions from the equation. Some situations are out of your control. You can create a financial safety net that will help to ease those worries.
It’s important to practice self-care, not only for yourself, but for everyone involved. “Self-care is taking deliberate and intentional actions to restore your own energy and strength. Just catching up with a friend over a cup of coffee can do wonders for the soul.
Remember that this time in your life will not go on forever but don’t wait until you’re pushed to the limit. A financial coach can help to guide and assist in managing the monetary needs of your parents and kids while ensuring your own financial stability. It’s never too late to start planning.
